Life of an Expat in KL- week 12 (finally settled in!)

Casa de Naber! Its a modern & spacious semi-d with private gate, cute little fish pond in our side yard, room for a garden, a fun community pool & playground, and guard house- safe & serene!

Hey readers,

I know that I am WAY overdue for an update but its been a bit hectic around here these days and I just got overwhelmed with it all. I am now VERY happy to report that we are comfortably living in our new home for the next three years AND we finally bought a car! Checking these two items of the “to-do” list has made me a very happy girl. I was so tired of temporary housing and running around in taxis trying to get errands done. Now I get to run around finding fun asian pieces for the new abode:)!

Anyway, we absolutely LOVE our home, our new neighbors are just delightful, and our quality of life has drastically improved with simply being able to stop running around like chickens with our heads cut off and start exploring more and enjoy living in KL while settling into our “new” routine.

All this being said, I do want to share with you 10 tips, hints, do’s & don’ts, and general info I  have learned along the way of settling into being a (successful) Expat in KL!

1. Preparatin is the KEY to success. I have always been a bit anal-retentive when it comes to preparation, organization, and list-making but this transition has really tested my skills!! I thought I had (most of) it all figured out but as I am sure anyone can imagine, there is always going to be something (or several things) that are forgotten or simply not known to be of importance. Since we were the “guinea pigs” of my husband’s company for expat life (outside of China), we truly have had to learn all of the nuances of expat life without much help. We did a TON of researching online, bough expat books, networked with former expats, took an 8 hour crash course on Malaysia/culture shock, etc…all before moving, but it still didn’t prepare us for what we would encounter. My 20/20 hindsight advice is this: absorb things like a sponge and do all of the above PLUS research more & make more lists and once you arrive, realize you still have a lot to learn so be prepared for the onslaught & try and enjoy the crazy ride through it all:).

2. Patience is a virtue! It took 14 weeks for our stuff to arrive in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia after it was packed up in Indianapolis, USA. Yes THAT is patience my friends. On top of that, just having the patience to figure out the exchange rate of currencies, speaking to people on the phone- both locals with the language barrier and via Skype & Viber to loved ones back home, a simple trip to the grocery store, trying to find out where to get your hair cut, or where to direct the taxi driver to take you (or trying to FIND one for that matter), are all things that requires A TON of patience:). Renting a home in a foreign country and all that comes along with that also requires a ton of patience; dealing with the real estate agents, communicating with contractors, internet & cable installers can all be hugely challenging. Oh and renters/health/auto insurance? Add that to the patience list too…and especially for buying a car- wowza! What a headache. I have struggled with patience a lot over the past 12 weeks as I am sure anyone would. I mean, the whole moving process is stressful enough, then add doing it in a foreign country and well, I think you get my drift. Deep breaths my friends and as they say..….”Stay calm and carry on”!!

2. The availability of items that are familiar to you takes some compromise! Since I’ve lived oversees before (back in my early 20’s studying in Sevilla, Spain) I knew going into this that the usual suspects of what I would want at any given store may or may not be available in my new home country. That being said,  it’s fun to explore and find out what is and is not stocked at grocery stores. There are many familiar brands but more not familiar brands. My advice is to try new things- especially local things around the SE Asia region. However, I know we all have our cravings (for us its Tostitos chips & salsa and Triscuits w/ hummus). Luckily, they do stock these items from time to time at certain stores here in KL but once they run out, they may not carry it again for a long time so it creates a peculiar balancing act of grabbing everything on the shelf while at the same time trying to be nice to other expats who also may want to find these items in the store for their “fix”:). And another thing- try not to go to the store with a specific recipe in mind because you may not find what you need or it may take several grocery stores to complete the list- improvising has become my best friend and I’ve actually created a few awesome asian fusion receipes as a result! As far as toiletries and the like, you may also struggle to find goods such as the brand/type of mascara, razors, deodorant, soap, etc that you’re used to. On top of that, it was illegal for the movers to pack food (dry & liquid), toiletries, etc back home so forget about thinking of stocking up at Costco & Target before moving out as it is NOT an option (unless you work for the US Embassy of course then apparently anything goes!).

3. A huge shocker for us has been the cost of certain items out here. Anything local is of course cheap but if you are looking for anything imported, be prepared to shell out the dough due to malaysia’s excessive import taxes. Also, to add on from the previous bullet point, those “familiar” items at the grocery store & pharmacy are also ridiculously expensive to buy…but again, worth it if you really have a craving! Beer, wine & hard alcohol are obnoxiously expensive here but its something we just learned to budget for accordingly and of course take advantage of in duty free when traveling around the region. We don’t have many vices so a bottle of wine with dinner is worth every cent (or “cen” here)!! Also, we weren’t prepared for the lack of quality and outrageous costs of BBQ’s here. We sold our old smaller gas grill thinking we would get a newer one here. Yea, not happening. The costs are ridiculous and the quality sub-par at best. Instead, David is learning to grill on a Webber Charcoal Grill that we found here at Ace Hardware and paid over double of what they cost in the states- hey, you live & learn, right?! All worth it for those All-American BBQ nights:)! On the flip side, you can get custom made Teak furniture out here for a steal!! We recently ordered a custom CA King bedroom set & dining room table. Afterwards we realized this also meant ordering a custom CA King mattress to go along with that as- hahaha.

4. Luxuries such as hot water in bathroom & kitchen sinks, a garbage disposal, a dishwasher, a clothes dryer, etc are all considered luxuries out here. Seriously…hot water?!?! Luckily, we were able to find a place with all of the above which has been very nice but while in temporary housing for 10 weeks we did not have any of it! Also, simple things such as outlets in bathrooms- yea, not legal nor available here pretty much throughout entire SE Asia region. Even the amount of outlets scattered throughout the rest of house are a fraction of what they should be. It truly  helps to be grateful for the little things in life as a result for sure!!

6. When dining out, its hilarious to me that the food comes out to the table with no order, rhyme or reason. So, your appetizers could come out at the end of the meal and don’t bother waiting for the other people at your table to get their food cause yours will get cold while you wait. Also, don’t count on a specific waiter…everyone helps out everyone…..its a double edge sword in my opinion but all part of the cultural experience for sure:). I will tell you this- it makes sense that there really is no tipping (although sometimes you will see a 5-10% service charge at nicer establishments). The variety of cuisine here in Malaysia is out of this world. You can literally get anything your heart desires….except for good Mexican food. Finally, don’t assume that brick & mortar restaurants have the best food around either. Malaysia is known for its “hawker stalls” and the food is phenomenal and costs mere pennies!

7. Buying a car as an expat is crazy. There are so many ins & outs to be aware of and out here the cost of cars are astronomical compared to the cost of cars in America. Seriously, take a simple Honda Accord- brand new they sell in the states for somewhere between $20,000-$30,000 depending on the model. Here in Malaysia they range from the equivalent of $45,000-$65,000!!!! Forget about a BMW, Mercedes, Lexus, or the like. Also, the whole car loan process given to expats are not the same as what they would offer locals, yet they offer as much as a 10 yr loan term- what?!?!. You do need to be leery of used car dealerships as they can fiddle with the mileage and try and rip off expats. My advice is to either buy new or go to an “expat” reliable used-car dealership (there is 1 guy in town that is HIGHLY recommended and only buys & sells to expats and walks you through the whole process from start to finish.

8. Safety is a concern, especially for women. The great thing though is that almost every Malaysian that I have met in some capacity have warned me of their “bad seeds”. Murders, rapes, etc are virtually non-existant here BUT purse-snatching and smash & grabs in cars can be common. Basically women need to be aware of their purses at all times as motorcyclists will speed be and try and “snatch” them. Also, don’t lave anything in plain sight in your car and don’t put your purse on the passenger seat- instead put it on the floor and lock everything out of sight in the trunk. Motorcyclists will follow your car and “smash” the windows and grab whatever is inside. Not a worry, I’ve been here 3 months and have not heard of or nor experienced any of this. Its always better to be safe than sorry though so I do very much appreciate the kindness of the Malaysians who warn me!

9. The language barrier can be comedy at times or frustrating at times. Although the official language of Malaysia is Bahasa Malay, English is their unofficial 2nd language. The amazing thing of it is that pretty much all classes & ages of Malaysians speak english which is great. Unfortunately, sometimes the accents on both sides get in the way and a simple conversation can get quite lengthy with hand gestures and explanations- LOL. Another funny part of the language game here is the Malaysian’s version of “slang”. From what I can gather, there top 3 slang words are “come”, “can”, and “la”. Illustration: to get a server to take your order: “come, come” (using hands); then asking server if you can have steamed rice instead of fried rice? His response: “can, can la”. It puts a smile on my face every time, I just love it.

10. Finally, be friendly to everyone, be respectful to the various cultures & religions, smile & be outgoing at the various expat functions,  and most importantly, don’t ever turn down an opportunity to meet people & get involved!

Happy & Safe Travels!

Kimbra